Mind Tourretts

So while I was forced to partake in the annual christmas eve service, which is pointless for an atheist, I started having a bit of Mind Tourretts.
Let me explain what that is exactly
I don't know if this happens to other people. Probably just me, I am kinda freakish. I'll zone out and start thinking about anything, ANYTHING. sometimes related to my surroundings, sometimes incredibly inappropriate or distasteful. and during my zoning out- I gradually become more and more aware of my surroundings-while my mind is still partially awander. and in my head, i'm shouting. shouting horrible awful mean things. and i keep shouting. and i'm not trying to shout. most of the times I cover my mouth because i'm afraid it'll just slip out when i'm not looking. and I also fear that REALLY awkward  moment when everyone is staring at you and it takes a few really long moments before things can start up again as they were. Thankfully, this has never happened to me before. but I worry. I really do worry. I should talk to someone about this. maybe my mind is possessed. maybe i need an exorcism. (totally kidding by the way)

Things I began to wonder during the service
-how much does a pastor make a year? would you be paid more if you became a religions teacher/professor instead
-does any look over or review the pastor's sermon before he gives it? sometimes I feel like he just babbles and no one wants to question him, so they just let him do whatever- which is a poor tactic if you ask me.
-do non-singing folk feel intimidated or more open to sing in church?

Merry Christmas Everyone