the more and more classes I have in sociology, the more mindful I become of everything I do.
Just now, I was thinking about how stumble upon photos were a big thing for me and now, not so much. The changing fads are ridiculous. Something catches our attention and they have us for a couple weeks or a month, until something else grabs it. It's new and shiny. ooo look at that. it's slightly more new or innovated. or whatever.
just like this blog. i don't post all the time. because of a few reasons 1.i usually don't have anything interesting to say. 2.what i would've posted, i wrote in letters to my boyfriend. I get bored during my classes and i write to him. apparently he keeps them all. which i love :) 3. because i'm boring. and i don't have much to say. i mean, i could easily rant about how i've always wanted to be a Peep sculptor when i got older but if there isn't too much substance to it, i don't feel the need to write it. idk.
i like the idea of writing. or typing rather. which is why i'd love to work for Bride's magazine. maybe not as a writer to start, just an assistant, but i'd love it. SOO much. i mean c'mon. i have a fricken binder!! it's like 400 pages of just pictures and ideas. I'm (sorta) helping my boyfriend's sister with her wedding planning. Purple and orange. gutsy colors when mixed together, but i like their style. It's their two favorite colors: his is orange, hers is purple. which is so adorable.
I've been pre-invited to the wedding. It's summer of 2013. which is a lofty suggestion, since that's over a year away and my boyfriend and I haven't even been dating that long ( i hope we'll still be dating then! <3 )
back to bride's magazine. i feel like i should be researching them. finding out where their hub is. (if it's NY, that would be awesome!) but if it's LA i might have to rethink a couple things.. (if this is even a serious consideration)
Friday, January 27, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Sociology
So this semester I'm taking a sociology class.
so far I absolutely love it!!
which I guess is a tad hypocritical for me to say since I'm in his class right now. We're supposed to be setting up our Sociology blogs. which I already did.
theactorssociology.blogspot.com
and i probably should be working on it but I have too many other things on my mind.
like the fact that I have a callback today for The Tempest! I was surprised how small the audition group was. 19 auditioned. 16 were called back. 12 roles plus an ensemble (which could be comprised of other casted actors, depending on the scene)
I'm so excited but really nervous. No matter what part I get (if I make it at all, knock on wood) I'll be happy but I really like the idea of being Antonio or Sebastian, they are the wicked brothers of Prospero and Alonso Respectively.
----------------------
so I revisited this post over 24 hours since I started it.
I got in the show! I'm playing Alonso, which is weird because I didn't even read for that part. but i'm excited!! :D it's going to rock!
so far I absolutely love it!!
which I guess is a tad hypocritical for me to say since I'm in his class right now. We're supposed to be setting up our Sociology blogs. which I already did.
theactorssociology.blogspot.com
and i probably should be working on it but I have too many other things on my mind.
like the fact that I have a callback today for The Tempest! I was surprised how small the audition group was. 19 auditioned. 16 were called back. 12 roles plus an ensemble (which could be comprised of other casted actors, depending on the scene)
I'm so excited but really nervous. No matter what part I get (if I make it at all, knock on wood) I'll be happy but I really like the idea of being Antonio or Sebastian, they are the wicked brothers of Prospero and Alonso Respectively.
----------------------
so I revisited this post over 24 hours since I started it.
I got in the show! I'm playing Alonso, which is weird because I didn't even read for that part. but i'm excited!! :D it's going to rock!
Monday, January 9, 2012
Finals: Procrastinating
tomorrow I have my first semester finals: day 1.
1: Contemp (i'll just be watching scenes, I already performed mine)
2: Media Analysis (easy multiple choice portion and an essay base off the *Truman Show. Somehow I always get A's on my essays for this class. I'm either a good writer or my teacher lowers her expectations for this class because it's college prep level)
4: Lunch (which means I get to leave early.
Since this is tomorrow's schedule, this means I need to be studying for my media final but I don't particularly want to. I'd be able to wing it and pass with a B easily, but I should look over the essay prompt.
Day 2
3: Choir (SUPER easy. basic music theory. lame)
7: Intermediate Dance (I still have to finish my choreography. I have to create 4 counts of 10 before the basic routine. I've created 2 maybe 3.)
5: Musical theatre (no final)
Day 3
8: Human Anatomy and Physiology- AC ( the only final I really have to worry about. I'm going to botch this. and I need to like ACE it just to get a B :[ )
6: Advanced Acting (the other final I'm worried about. not as much "studying" persay. but a lot of preparation I need to get done in the next few days)
then after finals i'm going on the CHOIR TRIP TO NEW YORK CITY!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm super excited (and this is coming at a good time too, since my bf and I are in a stupid unnecessary fight)
How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying with DARREN CRISS
and Sister Act!! and so much other fun things!
things I need to buy/do before I start backing
-shave
-buy black flats
-wash choir polo
-pick shoes/boots etc.
-check weather in NY
there are definitely more that I can't think of right now.
*The Truman Show is an amazing movie we watched in Media. Staring Jim Carey but one of his more dramatic roles. about a man who's entire life purpose is to be the star of TV show. but he doesn't know that his entire world is fake and has been created by a producer.
*The Truman Show is an amazing movie we watched in Media. Staring Jim Carey but one of his more dramatic roles. about a man who's entire life purpose is to be the star of TV show. but he doesn't know that his entire world is fake and has been created by a producer.
Until We Bleed
Until We Bleed- Lykke Li and Mikael's cello
So I was just at the doctor's office to make sure that I don't have mono. If I had gone yesterday, It is possible I could've- but based upon what I was feeling today, no chance in hell. Yesterday I felt like dying. Today I lived. (I win the cheesy award for that one) So they took my blood just to make sure nothing is wrong with me- especially since they haven't taken my blood ever. I don't think. at least not at this doctors office.
I've learned that I either stare at the needle and then take a few deep breathes and then make some kind of corny joke to lighten the mood and then the nurse gives me this weird look and then I sit their awkwardly until she's done. This time I had the cool nurse, she's indian (not that being indian makes you automatically cool, but I feel like it at least gives you a couple more cool points [is racial favoritism the same thing as being racist? I don't dislike the other ones, I just like some more than others] ) she's pretty young and really relateable. Like a peer rather than a starkly cold professional. It was comforting. So instead of doing what I normally do, this time I just gabbed on and on until she was done. I stared at the wall. Which was nice. I didn't even have to look at it. I was surprised how fast it went- because I was focused on the story and not the drawing of blood.
We talked about how I often slap my boyfriend to get him back in line. I use this on most men actually. It's surprisingly effective. You should try it some time. and no lame slaps, it should be a powerful one. to show them you have the power. It gives me such a self esteem boost- especially being a woman.
back to the doctor's office. My doctor mentioned i might have a thyroid condition with my throat being swollen-ish lately and my constant low temperature. It's usually like 96 or 97, when most people are 98. because of this, it is difficult to tell whether or not I have a fever because If I have a low grade fever like 99 or 100, I wouldn't know because my thermometer would read around 98- which is normal. I wonder what kind of thyroid condition I would have if I have one. I also hope my blood reports something interesting. not necessarily bad, just interesting. I still don't know what blood type I have. and I think that's an important piece of information to know during your lifetime.
and because I gorged on chocolate earlier, I felt like throwing up at the doctor's office. note to self: never gorge on chocolate again.
So I was just at the doctor's office to make sure that I don't have mono. If I had gone yesterday, It is possible I could've- but based upon what I was feeling today, no chance in hell. Yesterday I felt like dying. Today I lived. (I win the cheesy award for that one) So they took my blood just to make sure nothing is wrong with me- especially since they haven't taken my blood ever. I don't think. at least not at this doctors office.
I've learned that I either stare at the needle and then take a few deep breathes and then make some kind of corny joke to lighten the mood and then the nurse gives me this weird look and then I sit their awkwardly until she's done. This time I had the cool nurse, she's indian (not that being indian makes you automatically cool, but I feel like it at least gives you a couple more cool points [is racial favoritism the same thing as being racist? I don't dislike the other ones, I just like some more than others] ) she's pretty young and really relateable. Like a peer rather than a starkly cold professional. It was comforting. So instead of doing what I normally do, this time I just gabbed on and on until she was done. I stared at the wall. Which was nice. I didn't even have to look at it. I was surprised how fast it went- because I was focused on the story and not the drawing of blood.
We talked about how I often slap my boyfriend to get him back in line. I use this on most men actually. It's surprisingly effective. You should try it some time. and no lame slaps, it should be a powerful one. to show them you have the power. It gives me such a self esteem boost- especially being a woman.
back to the doctor's office. My doctor mentioned i might have a thyroid condition with my throat being swollen-ish lately and my constant low temperature. It's usually like 96 or 97, when most people are 98. because of this, it is difficult to tell whether or not I have a fever because If I have a low grade fever like 99 or 100, I wouldn't know because my thermometer would read around 98- which is normal. I wonder what kind of thyroid condition I would have if I have one. I also hope my blood reports something interesting. not necessarily bad, just interesting. I still don't know what blood type I have. and I think that's an important piece of information to know during your lifetime.
and because I gorged on chocolate earlier, I felt like throwing up at the doctor's office. note to self: never gorge on chocolate again.
teenagers are stupid: chocolate gorge
When i'm upset I gorge myself with chocolate or other feel good foods.
like popcorn
or mashed potatoes
or stuffing
or soup.
and when I say gorge, I mean GORGE. I'm currently in a "fight" with my boyfriend and I ate ice cream and whoppers and Reese's pieces and a ghiradelli square and a york peppermint patty and a piece of fudge. (I also learned that if you eat a lot of different sources of chocolate quickly, it loses the chocolate taste- especially since they're all different types of chocolate). and all after I had Ramen when I came home yea. i'm fat.
i'm not a fat person. I'm tall, 5'8". but i'm a theatre person so i'm not really that physically active and I don't take care of myself AT ALL. (I had actually proposed an idea to myself once when I couldn't fall asleep, to spend one entire week just eating fruits and vegetables. no sweets. no carbs. nothing. just fruits and veggies. just to clean out my system. plus, i'm lactose intolerant and it would be good to lay off the dairy for a while. I don't take care of myself in that sense either.)
okay back to my physical being, I'm pretty tall. but not very healthy. at all. but i hate when, my boyfriend especially say that I'm skinny. specifically when he talks about my "lack of stomach". I have a gut. not especially pronounced, but I know how to hide it pretty well. and sometimes if i'm laying down or just ate a lot, you could say i looked pregnant. I carry more extra weight then people realize. Idk- but the compliment just highlights my insecurities. and i don't like feeling insecure. no one does really.
so I'm leaving for the doctor soon to make sure I don't have mono ( i hope not... [is it weird that part of me is hoping that i do 1. so i can be sick and stay home 2.so my boyfriend will have to suffer too] ). i feel like shit for eating all the chocolate. part of me feels like I probably deserved the pain. idk.
boys are stupid. doctors are stupid. teenagers are stupid.
like popcorn
or mashed potatoes
or stuffing
or soup.
and when I say gorge, I mean GORGE. I'm currently in a "fight" with my boyfriend and I ate ice cream and whoppers and Reese's pieces and a ghiradelli square and a york peppermint patty and a piece of fudge. (I also learned that if you eat a lot of different sources of chocolate quickly, it loses the chocolate taste- especially since they're all different types of chocolate). and all after I had Ramen when I came home yea. i'm fat.
i'm not a fat person. I'm tall, 5'8". but i'm a theatre person so i'm not really that physically active and I don't take care of myself AT ALL. (I had actually proposed an idea to myself once when I couldn't fall asleep, to spend one entire week just eating fruits and vegetables. no sweets. no carbs. nothing. just fruits and veggies. just to clean out my system. plus, i'm lactose intolerant and it would be good to lay off the dairy for a while. I don't take care of myself in that sense either.)
okay back to my physical being, I'm pretty tall. but not very healthy. at all. but i hate when, my boyfriend especially say that I'm skinny. specifically when he talks about my "lack of stomach". I have a gut. not especially pronounced, but I know how to hide it pretty well. and sometimes if i'm laying down or just ate a lot, you could say i looked pregnant. I carry more extra weight then people realize. Idk- but the compliment just highlights my insecurities. and i don't like feeling insecure. no one does really.
so I'm leaving for the doctor soon to make sure I don't have mono ( i hope not... [is it weird that part of me is hoping that i do 1. so i can be sick and stay home 2.so my boyfriend will have to suffer too] ). i feel like shit for eating all the chocolate. part of me feels like I probably deserved the pain. idk.
boys are stupid. doctors are stupid. teenagers are stupid.
A Brick Wall
I'm not an actor. I'm not a performer. Not to say I don't perform, I do. I take acting classes, a dance class, choir, and voice lessons. I wish I was taking piano lessons and some more dance classes. but I'm still not a performer.
All the theatre kids I know talk about how when they were kids they took years of dance classes or loved to be on stage or loved to be the center of attention. I liked having attention - I'm the youngest child, but i distinctly remember anytime they needed a kid volunteer- specifically at magic shows, I would hide. I would get out of my seat and curl up in a ball on the floor. I was terrified. I hated the idea of being up in front of everyone and I still do. I love performing when you can't see the audience. A curtain of black blanketing the threat to my abilities. and I feel terrible about it- because it's what I love to do and I'm good at it.
but breath supports and general fears just stand in my way- a stupid brick wall I keep ramming up against- like a stupid persistent ram (pun intended).
Logistically, I should apply to my schools as general education. it makes sense. I'd have more acceptances. I'd have more options. more time to decide. there are other things I can see myself doing with my life. It doesn't have to be theatre. I could write, or work for Bride's magazine or be a teacher or a homemaker or a nurse- who knows? Maybe I'll open up a pizzeria or a pie bakery. My life is what I make of it, right? then why am I so scared to try something else?
All the theatre kids I know talk about how when they were kids they took years of dance classes or loved to be on stage or loved to be the center of attention. I liked having attention - I'm the youngest child, but i distinctly remember anytime they needed a kid volunteer- specifically at magic shows, I would hide. I would get out of my seat and curl up in a ball on the floor. I was terrified. I hated the idea of being up in front of everyone and I still do. I love performing when you can't see the audience. A curtain of black blanketing the threat to my abilities. and I feel terrible about it- because it's what I love to do and I'm good at it.
but breath supports and general fears just stand in my way- a stupid brick wall I keep ramming up against- like a stupid persistent ram (pun intended).
Logistically, I should apply to my schools as general education. it makes sense. I'd have more acceptances. I'd have more options. more time to decide. there are other things I can see myself doing with my life. It doesn't have to be theatre. I could write, or work for Bride's magazine or be a teacher or a homemaker or a nurse- who knows? Maybe I'll open up a pizzeria or a pie bakery. My life is what I make of it, right? then why am I so scared to try something else?
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